Blaglash.com

I am a self professed fan of the ridiculous. I saw “Little Man” in theatres which means I paid for a ticket. I own “John Tucker Must Die” and “Milkshake” by Kelis is my text ringtone. But believe me when I say that I truly from the bottom of my heart love Lindsay Lohan, without any of the aforementioned influence of my coexisting love of the ridiculous.

I feel like Lindsay is at the epicenter of embarrassing Hollywood social-ites. People lump her in with Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, Nicole Ritchie and Mischa Barton. Those girls suck. Britney needs serious help, Mischa was a one-hit wonder, and Paris/Nicole are pathetic/ugly/annoying. While I admit that Lilo has her moments, they’re forgetting that Lindsay is naturally beautiful and actually talented. WHICH is proved very easily with three words: THE PARENT TRAP. Two more words are supporting evidence: MEAN GIRLS.

For some reason I feel like Lindsay is like a lot of girls I knew in college, in that she has a lot of potential and doesn’t know what to do with herself. I think Lilo can make a comeback, in a big way. I wish I was friends with her, because I would give her this advice after inviting her over and making us bean dip/guacamole and drinking arizona iced tea while watching 30 Rock:

1. Dye your hair back to believable shades. Something natural-ish and never touch bleach again.

2. Throw away bronzer and buy expensive sunscreen.

3. Likewise with the leggings. Or at least limit leggings to once a week.

4. Star in a credible ROMCOM with a really good actor.

5. Never take your little sister to a night club again.

6. Fund a youth-oriented charity.

7. Invest in real estate! (that is advice I’d give anyone who can afford it)

Linz, please please please get your act together! Your fans are counting on you to clean up and emerge as your gorgeous amazing self. Also, if you read this, I want to hang out! xoxoxoxoxoxo

Just think how pretty she’d be without the fucking bronzer.

ps- Just My Luck is an amazing movie. Don’t listen to Bryan.